Curtains up for new court … FCFCOA is now upon us … A camel designed by Bookshelves Brandis … What can go wrong? … Two Wigs Willy down to one wig … Limited input from lawyers in development of blockbuster rules and directions … New titles … New registrars … A family lawyer writes 

Complete with dazzling video introductions from Alstergren CJ himself, along with Michaelia Cash and LCA Prez Brash Jacoba, it is clearly hoped that the roll-out hides the gaping chasms that remain in the family law system.

After a long and contentious process spanning two governments, Senate enquiries and staunch opposition from the legal profession and almost all other users of the Court – including Women’s Legal Services, NATSIL, domestic violence organisations and past and present judges of the courts themselves, the clumsily named “Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia” is upon us.

Two Wigs, who strictly speaking is down to One Wig, has released an avalanche of press releases in the past weeks and continues on his personal media roadshow promoting the introduction of a self-styled “world class family law system” promising to dispatch pesky families in strife within 12 months. Chaos, however, threatens.

The 300 plus pages of the new Rules and Practice Directions, which One Wig has made a personal project, were only released after close of business on Friday. 

Persistent offers by the legal profession to assist in the development of the rules were resisted by the court, with the most limited opportunity being provided to comment on relevant aspects in isolation from each other and from the broader scheme intended for the operation of the new circus. 

Those who have had the time report that pitfalls abound in the new rules.

But not to worry, all is dazzling and new. Hitherto unknown, “Senior Judicial Registrars” will dispense justice to the unwary, aided by the newly glorified Senior Registrars. 

With masterful ease, the bean-counters have created a wonderful new set of titles seeking to cloak the roles with judicial aura while obscuring the fact that there is limited remunerative reward for elevation and even less ability to attract the interest of those who might be best suited for the roles.

With commendable bravado One Wig Willy proudly announced the appointment of some “42 experienced family law practitioners to provide significant support to family law judges across Australia” as new Registrars of the Court. 

All that was missing from the show were cameos by the instigator of the debacle Lord Brandis, his faithful acolyte that serial consumer of family law services Christian Porter, along with Rex Patrick who sold his deciding vote in the Senate – perhaps for more South Australian submarines. 

Here’s hoping that Two Wigs has not hitched himself to the wrong wagon – might just prove unhelpful to his Federal Court ambitions.